He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
