Pants 0. Shit 1.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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