how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
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The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
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All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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