So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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