Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I can't put those talents on a resume
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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