Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
