"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize