Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize
