listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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