It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I need a burrito and a hug.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
