Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You are a genius and a whore.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
