What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Randomize
