party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
