at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Holy shit dude........stairs
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