yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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