I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize