I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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