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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  your address is 607B right?

  (785): View more from Kansas

  yeah why?

  (913): View more from Kansas

  i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.

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  23 “Girl Codes” Guys Probably Don’t Know About

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• (925): View more from California

  can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet

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• (206): View more from Washington

  i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone

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  19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.

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• (858): View more from California

  He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Hows the party lookin?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  How are you feeling?

  (435): View more from Utah

  I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza

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