3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash