i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
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So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
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god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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