sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize