Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
