6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize