ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You have to summon your inner elephant
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
