is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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