none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
