So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
