getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize