its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
barbara walters just said penis...
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.