The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
