I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
