New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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