I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
