Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
