I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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