we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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