Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
