i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
