This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
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Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
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You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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