I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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