they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
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i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
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BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret