i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm too high and old for this...
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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