On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize
