just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
