I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
