But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Your cock deserves a montage
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Randomize
