She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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