he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize