you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
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