its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
