no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
